Another Sex Blog

…bother? I wonder.

I like sex. I like casual sex. Why do guys feel like they have to pretend that it’s more than that and then make me feel like shit?

Is there something *wrong* with wanting just sex?

Apparently there is if one is a chick.

This time: he was from out of town. likely never gonna see him again. obviously a one time thing.

Nice “date” — meeting to find out if we were at least attracted to one another in real life.

Sex. GOOD sex. For me anyway. Can’t swear it was for him. I had multiple orgasms, though, so good for me by far.

Afterwards? He’s an ass. I don’t think it’s really necessary to go into details because this has happened other times, too, in different forms.

Why? Seriously. I just don’t understand. Why do guys feel the NEED to be an ass? I make it quite clear that I’m NOT one of the kinds of girls that is going to glom onto them just cuz we had sex (and I don’t mean to stereotype other women in saying that, but that IS a preconceived notion out there.)

I know I’m not even expressing this the way I mean to cuz I’m pissed off right now as I’m writing it. I write better when I’m more level headed.

Fuck it though.

You know?

The last poll’s purpose was to give me some more procrastination time. And then I took even longer that that allowed for. I was never really planning on writing only or first about whatever topic got the highest votes — I was planning on writing about all of them — eventually.

Way back on the weekend of St. Pat’s, I went on a date with a guy from Adult FriendFinder. We met at a classy bar — a very nice locale for this sort of thing. He was very attractive, funny, intelligent. We had some great conversation, at least in my opinion. It was close to an idea first date. I liked him a lot and I knew that I’d like to spend more time with him. I’m pretty sure he wasn’t *repulsed* by me. So, what went wrong? Easy answer, I think. I got drunk. Wasted. Completely hammered.

It wasn’t intentional. Actually, I think the fact that I was having such a good time contributed to me not paying too much attention to my intake. Personally, I believe I’m somewhat more charming when slightly tipsy. But that wasn’t the case this time.

I only remember bits and pieces of the night between leaving the bar and leaving his place in the morning. Of course, not all of that memory loss is a result of too much booze (scotch in case you’re wondering.) Some is simply because it happened over a month ago. Yes, we did have sex. I don’t know how many times exactly. I’m pretty sure he came in my mouth, but I wouldn’t bet my life on it. I vaguely remember having anal sex, but I might be making that up.

I’m pretty sure I didn’t come. I’m noisy even when I don’t, though, so the gentleman I was with might think I did. That’s not a criticism of him, btw, just a descriptive fact.

Ok, to be honest, even though I’m not sharing details, the sex was just average. Not great. Not horrible. Just ok. So-so.

It’s important to me to acknowledge my part of the blame for the so-so-ness. (Or in anything that goes wrong for that matter.) But, having done that, yeah, he did some things wrongly, too. I’m not really comfortable publicly reporting them or denouncing him personally, though. I have no clue if he’s reading this and I think that would just be horribly rude.

I was really awkward the next morning when I left, too. Which I’m not usually. I just had no idea what he was thinking… was this intended to be a one-nighter or not? Usually I know. I was all discombobulated!! I think that maybe if I didn’t feel like I goofed things up by getting so drunk, I wouldn’t have trouble telling him what he did “wrong”. And so then if we *were* compatible, we could have discussed it and made everything all nice. At least in my fantasy world.

Oh well. The next night I had a date with another guy from Adult FriendFinder. And, uhm, yeah. WOW.

Maybe I’ll even blog about that soon.

Guys will fuck anything that moves.

That’s what a lot of people believe. Or say they believe anyway.

I think about sex a lot. (I know, you’re saying “Noooo. Really?”) I don’t mean fantasizing, though I do that, too. I think about psychological and physical aspects of sex. I just find it fascinating and have the hardest time understanding that not everyone does, but that’s another thing I spend time thinking about…

So, the idea that men aren’t picky when it comes to who they’ll have sex with is one of those concepts, ideas, memes, that I sometimes ponder. I’m talking about basically a horny one-night stand, btw, not an ongoing relationship — even of the No Strings Attached variety.

So, guys, is it true?

It seems to me that people tend to hook up, either short term or long term, with people similar to themselves. In terms of looks. Good looking people with good looking people. Average with average. Etc. Yeah, there are the exceptions — the really hot model with the super rich not-so-hot older guy being the stereotypical example. But, you know, in general.

But when it’s “Hey, I wanna get laid tonight. Let’s see who I can take home…?”

Women (in general — this is all in general, I realize it could be different for any one individual) tend to only have sex with men they’re attracted to. Now that could be completely physical, but women also tend to find a guy that they really LIKE for whatever reason more attractive. As they get to know a guy, and begin to like him, their attraction actually grows. Sorry, I’m digressing.

Hmmm… it just occurred to me that there’s also the beer-goggles factor to consider.

Yes, this is *really* the kind of thing I spend LOTS of time wondering about.

Yeah, I don’t know what that title means either.

I’ve changed my profile to indicate that now I’m looking for… well… I still don’t know what to call it. Not a one-nighter. Not Friends with benefits — because, personally, I’ve found the benefits part of that not to be so evenly distributed among the friends involved. Not a committed Long Term Relationship, though, either. Something between the one-nighter and the LTR. A Friends with Benefits with Potential. Which means more than two dates, I guess, so I have to nix that policy.

Other random thoughts:

I like these new smileys. I feel like thinking up things to say just to be able to use them.

I just got back from my ex-boyfriend’s place. We talked. Had a beer. Gave him a blowjob. Then I left. I didn’t really get anything obvious out of it, but I still had fun. Does that make me weird or what? I say I didn’t get anything “obvious”, because I did get *something* out of it, otherwise I wouldn’t have done it and wouldn’t have left with a smile on my face. Ok, first I really *like* giving head. And he tastes particularly good. And, damn, he just *appreciates* it so much! It’s nice. Hmmm… I can’t help but think of the people who criticized my earlier adventures and are soooo sure that I’m disturbed in some way. I’m pretty sure they’d see this post as more evidence for their theory, but hey, if I’m crazy and *happy* then who the hell cares if I’m crazy?

That’s it. I have nothing else for now. I thought I had more random thoughts chasing around in my head, but they’re hiding and I can’t find them at the moment.

G’night.

I’m an optimist. Which basically means that — well, actually it means I do spend a lot of my time quite happy. Looking forward to things. Being hopeful. But it also means I’m frequently disappointed.

I went on another second date. And to all you people who might be thinking, hey, I thought you were on hiatus… oh just shut up. Alright, I might as well address that first.

I was on hiatus from AFF. I’m on another site that’s like the evil twin of AdultFriendFinder. I hadn’t been very active over there before, but thought I’d give it a chance. So, actually I *have* been seeing new people. Just only new very kinky people. Ok. End of confession.

So, in my post about no more 2nd dates, I mentioned a guy who I said I *would* go on a second date with. And then he emailed me. Having read that. I think. So, I said yes.

On the first date, he was awesomely nice to me. He flirted with me. He gave me compliments — lots of them. Even though compliments make me a bit uncomfortable and I can never completely believe them, I’m still a complete sucker for them. And once we got to the down and dirty stuff, he was attentive. If you know what I mean. (Pssst… that means he seemed to both *care* if I came AND made an active attempt to make it happen.)

I just got home from the second date. Originally it was supposed to be from 8 p.m. tonight right through til tomorrow. Then he moved it up to this afternoon. And made reference to how it would be a close to 24 hour session. Or at least 24 hours of being together. Take a look at the time of this post. Yeah. I’m home.

Second date was EXACTLY what I said they all are in my previous post when I declared my new no 2nd date rule. Except that it didn’t last only an hour. Looking at that other post I see that I didn’t actually write as much as I thought I did. Other second dates were lasting about an hour. That whole call girl reference was referring to that. So, this one lasted a lot longer, but relative to how long it was supposed to go, is this really any different?

And instead of my not coming at all when the guy does get to come, this time I didn’t come and he came three times. He may be reading this and be pissed off that I’m complaining. I don’t know. If so, let me point out that it’s not personal. It’s just how guys are, I guess. I should know that by now. He’s also probably thinking that I came twice. NO, I said “I’m going to cum” twice. Not the same thing.

Oh, and not one compliment at all. Good to see you doesn’t count.

Really this post is not about him. It’s about me being stupidly optimistic and not paying attention to my own rules that I made based on my own observations. I’m sure I’ll do it again.

I don’t think it’s possible to have what I say I want in my profile. My new one. Yes, I’m changing the subject. Guys can’t be extraordinarily turned on by a girl and really really want to fuck her AND like her. (I don’t mean to rant against men — it’s just that I’m looking for a guy to do that so it doesn’t concern me whether or not it’s possible for women. Or anteaters. Or elm trees.) Someone said in response to my new profile — back when it was just a blog posting — that awww, I was looking for love. No, I’m not. All I want is like. I really don’t need love and devotion and commitment and all that. I just want to be liked AND lusted after.

I don’t think that’s possible. So, back to one date only. Because I don’t want to give up the sex that I love so much just to have some guy like me. My friends like me. My family, most of them, like me. Hell, most of the time *I* like me, too. I don’t actually lust after myself, but I do make myself cum… I think I’m just going to hang out with myself for a while.

Guys who are reading this… if anyone’s gotten all the way this far!… this is NOT an anti-guy rant. I love men. I *like* them. This post is mainly a reminder for myself to read.

1) Do NOT go on second dates! You will NOT have good sex AND you’ll be reminded that the guy doesn’t LIKE you. Stop. Don’t do it!

2) If the guy doesn’t get you off just do it yourself. And if he makes a joke about you doing so, punch him in the balls while he’s still lying there naked and go back to what you were doing.

3) Don’t let guys know that you like sex and not just sex with them. Guys SAY that’s appealing. Then they get all grumpy when you make any reference to it.

4) Make sure that there’s still some ice cream in the refrigerator when you get home from a date because it really sucks to be depressed and have to get back in your car to go get some.

Meant to write this a while ago.

Actually, I was out on a “date” with a guy who said he “already” wanted to see me again. Before we even got naked. LOL. So, I told him, well, good thing I didn’t post my new rule about no more second dates then, huh? He took that to mean he had no chance at a second date. I meant that it would be ironic if I’d posted that I no longer was going on second dates and then immediately went out with a guy who I wanted to see again. Anyway. That’s besides the point.

So, why no more 2nd dates? No second chance, do-overs, repeats, sequels, etc.

I self-identify as a slut. That I *want* to be a slut. I do NOT like feeling like a callgirl. Yes, there’s a difference. And it’s not just the fact that I ain’t getting paid.

The first dates are fun. Exciting. Interesting at the very least. There’s at least some talking. Laughing. And during the sex itself? I’m making assumptions about the guys’ intentions here, I know that. I think they’re trying to impress me. They try, at least, to make it enjoyable for me, too. And any “dates” after that? It’s all about what they want.

Ugh, that doesn’t sound right. I mean, I *like* doing the pleasing. That’s not the problem in itself. There’s no effort to get me off. There’s no non-sex foreplay. There’s rarely much sexual foreplay either. It’s very very similar to what I imagine (cuz I don’t have actual personal experience with this) a callgirl experience is like. Call her up. Tell her what you want. She does it. Nothing in return. (Well, at least a callgirl gets paid, I suppose.) Then send her on her way.

Ok, I sound a LOT more bitter than I am. I’m not. I’m not mad at men. Or any thing else negative. I’m just saying that what happens on second dates is not what I’m looking for. Live and learn, right?

So, only first dates from now on. But I reserve the right to change my mind for certain people. Like the guy I mentioned above.

With him… I ended up drinking too much and we didn’t get to the good stuff til the next morning. And, yes, it was good. Even if the jewelry on the pierced cock clinked on my teeth a bit too much. I’m sure with some practice I could get used to it, right?

He wanted to spray my face with his cum. As long as I get to lick some of it up… sounds good to me! Yum.

Plus he was really fucking good looking.

Why do I even attempt to write about any of my experiences when it just makes me horny?

I got a new toy recently… .
I think I better go make sure it works. G’nite.