Another Sex Blog

I’ve written once before about being recognized here Adult FriendFinder by someone I know IRL.

(totally unrelated aside: Again, I’m blogging while watching tv… why do I think it’s kind of hot when a guy gets all worked up and pissed off during an encounter with an ex-wife. Just on tv. Never actually had the experience otherwise. Weird.)

I don’t really mind if someone I know sees me on here and recognizes me. I mean, first of all, most people that know me wouldn’t be surprised by it at all. Second, how judgmental could they BE? They’re on AFF, too!

I’ve been a little more worried about someone seeing me on the street, in a store, in a restaurant, etc., and realizing that I’m [username on AFF]. I’ve thought about how I’d react if someone approached me. I can be sure of how I’d really react, but I think if the person was polite, respectful, nice, I’d be kind of flattered that my profile had stuck in their mind enough for them to recognize me. So, what I’m really worried about (”really” meaning “truthfuly”, not “very”) is someone being NOT respectful. Being rude. Basically being presumptuous. Lol. Actually, I’m pretty sure I know how I’d react to that, too, but I’ll keep that my own little secret.

What has happened recently, more than once, is my being recognized as [username on AFF] on other sites where I have a presence under another username.

So. I’ve had people contact me on these other sites saying they’ve realized I’m [username on AFF]. I’ve also had emails sent to me on my so-called throwaway email address I have that’s related to my name there. That one really amazes me. I only check that email once a month or less. It’s like a junk email address for me. It’s *not* the one I give out to people there if we ever get to the point of off-Adult FriendFinder communication. So, I can only assume that those emails (there’s been about four, I think) are sent by guys who don’t have a paid membership there and are trying to find a way to email me for free.

That’s kind of a pet peeve of mine. I am so completely not a gold-digger. I don’t care at all about how much money a guy makes. Except if it’s way way more than me… that actually makes me uncomfortable. BUT. I’m a girl — I could get emails on there without paying. I’m a *librarian*; I’m not swimming in expendable income. I have a paying membership there because I’m serious about it. Ok, sorry, end of rant.

I’m not sure how I feel about this kind of recognition. There’s no strong feeling about it, positive or negative. For the record, the people who have contacted me in one of these other ways have been of the first sort that I mentioned above — polite, nice, flattering. And that really is how the vast majority of contact I’ve had have been, btw. All the complaints that you hear from women about the guys who are assholes doesn’t mean that the *majority* of guys are like that. It’s just that there too many that are.

If you’ve read my last post, here’s an update. I’ve been expecting to hear from the guy who I have a crush on and haven’t. I’m pretty sure I’m being blown off at this point. I’ve already decided that if our not-definite plan to meet up tonight doesn’t come to fruition, I’m still going to get all gussied up like I was looking forward to. I’m going out to some swanky restaurant or bar. And I’m gonna flirt like hell.

So, if you see me out there tonight and recognize me. Be nice, ok?

on VH1. Starring Mystery.

This show is frigging hiLARious. I love it. A few years ago I read “The Game” by Neil Strauss which is also all about this whole pickup thingy.

Guys, it works. I hate to admit it. Just about every “trick” I’ve heard on the show or read in the book undoubtedly will work most of the time. EVEN on a girl, like me, who’s aware of what you’re doing. That’s so sad, isn’t it?

Well, with one exception, for me anyway. The “neg” — at least the ones that are basically a backhanded compliment. I hate those. They piss me off.

Anyway, my real post topic is — where the hell are the pickup guidelines for women who want to pick up hot men? Stop laughing. I’m serious.

There’s this idea out there that it’s a snap for a girl to get laid. Well, ok, yeah, in its most literal interpretation, that’s true. But, just like for men, it’s the *really* hot guys/girls who have almost no problem. There’s also the added fact (or broad generalization) that women have higher standards for who they want to sleep with. That could be a whole post on its own, but yeah, I could easily *just* get laid. I do NOT get hit on by guys that are super hot.

Oh, and I’m not saying that I’m only interested in those out of the world model type guys any more than most guys are only interested in out of the world model type women. But, it would be nice to know how to hit on them.

Great, now that I’m done watching the show I can’t remember what I wanted to babble about. I guess there’s always next time.

Oh, and I went out bar-hopping kind of on Friday. Why the HELL are all the really REALLY hot guys gay and hanging out at gay bars? WTF? Dammit. Now I’m both horny AND ornery.

I’ve often been told that I look younger than I really am. I’m not entirely sure why that is. I think I sometimes dress “young.”

(I am NOT going to start dressing in pajama bottoms and flip-flops and not brush my hair. What is UP with that trend?)

I purposely do NOT dye the gray out of my hair just so there’s a chance people will assume I am my actual age.

And people always tell me how great it is that I look younger than I am. That I should enjoy it and take it as a compliment. What could the downside possibly be?

Last night I had dinner at an Irish pub. Alone. I eat out a lot and I more often than not eat alone. I love doing that. Eating and taking a book with me to read and just enjoying my own company. Anyway… I did get hit on twice. Two guys at separate times approached my table. Without going into detail, cuz it’s pretty boring and irrelevant, I found out their ages. Both of them were 23.

I’m 31. TWENTY THREE!!!

Oh, btw, I’m currently at my 10 year college reunion. When I graduated college these guys were probably freshman in highschool.

Anyway, *that’s* the drawback. I don’t really want to date guys that much younger than me. I don’t even want to just fuck them. I sometimes get emails from guys who are 20, 21, 22, around there, saying that they have a thing for older women. HELLO? I’m 31. I’m not an “older woman” yet. Yeah, I’m older than them. But not Older.

Actually, the drawback of looking younger isn’t that younger guys are the ones hitting on me, it’s that the guys my age and a few years older are not. Sometimes guys who are MUCH older than me hit on me, but that’s just kind of creepy. *Especially* since I know I look younger.

Yeah, that’s my complaint for the day.

I haven’t posted for a little while mainly because I have too many things I want to babble about and can’t seem to decide which to choose. I think I need a magic 8 ball.

So, I’m in Denver. For a librarian conference. No, really. We have conferences!

Anyway, I got in late last night and immediately headed to the hotel bar/lounge for food and drinks. Somehow I forgot to bring something to read! This is a huge deal. I *always* have something to read with me. I could have gone back up to my room to get a book, but there was only about 10 minutes left for the bar to take food orders… so, I took out the journal/notebook I carry in my purse and began to blog the old-fashioned way, with pen and paper.

Did you know that alcohol has a greater / faster effect on you in higher altitudes? True. This is my second drunk blogging post. Except that now, when I’m transcribing it, I’m sober. This is really not giving an accurate impression of me… *sigh*

Heregoes as written in my notebook (with spelling corrections):

I’m in Denver. For a librarian conference.

*Not written in my notebook: Hmmm… sounds familiar. Ok, Ok, I’ll stop making comments about what I wrote…*

Actually I’m writing — pen & paper — in the hotel lounge. I’d so love to take one of these guys back to my room! Well, one of about three guys.

Not being on the site all day long makes me even more behind in answering emails. Something like 28 new ones today. And I promised in my profile to answer all of them. THAT was stupid.

Oh! And O’Hare, on a weeknight at least, is FULL of men!!! And they all look familiar. LOL! So. Weird.

What would any of these guys do if I basically just asked them to accompany me back to my room? See, guys SAY hey, that would be awesome. But really, wouldn’t you be a bit freaked out? Even if it was a girl as luscious as me? LOL! J/k. I’m too scared to find out. I really can’t handle that kind of rejection well.

I’d be more likely to try if any of these guys were alone. But they’re all in groups of 3 or 4. One’s leaving. Damn. Anyway. 2 of the 3 are (were) in a group with one woman. Which makes me even less likely to flirt. Damn damn damn.

What would I say anyway?

Really I believe I would have approached this one guy who was here earlier alone. Would have asked him if he knew where to get dinner and if he wanted to join me. Easy. Not so easy when a guy’s with other people. Diamn is this how guys feel at bars all the time?

Is it so wrong somehow to be so picky about looks — particularly body type? Or to be picky about age?

Age — I think of myself as so much younger than I actually am. So guys not THAT much older than me seem a LOT older.

Ok. One of the guys has definitely (?) noticed me noticing him. Now what? Because my first reaction is that he’s thinking “yeah, right. Like YOU could have ME.” I don’t think I have low self-esteem. *I* think I’m great. I just don’t ever believe that anyone else does, too.

A guy I’m NOT interested in just tried to converse with me.

*I’m tired. The rest to be finished tomorrow.*