Another Sex Blog

Oh, c’mon, don’t be insulted, Adult FriendFinder, when I call other sites normal.

I have no idea how to go on a normal date with someone from a normal dating site. Isn’t there some sort of manual somewhere that can tell me what the rules are?

I don’t know what to say in response to an email. I don’t know what to say in an email I initiate. I don’t know how I’m supposed to act if we meet. What are we supposed to talk about?

Even on AFF, it gets confusing. I think it’s pretty obvious in my profile that I’m not looking for a NSA thing. That doesn’t mean that I expect an attempt at a relationship for every person I meet, but I’d like for the person to be open to that possibility. I’m not against one-night stands either, but in that case, I’m more interested in looks than anything else and there’s better opportunities for that at a bar or club than there is on AFF (for a girl anyway.) So, as I was saying… even on AFF, sometimes I meet someone and they want to go have sex immediately, or within hours of meeting. Sometimes that’s what happens. Other times there’s actual conversation that goes on first. Sometimes there’s making out instead of full-on sex. Sometimes there’s a “no thanks, but nice meeting you.”

As for the normal dating sites — twice I’ve gone out with someone from another site (2 different sites), and it turned out they “knew” me from AFF. No, 3 times, actually. Which in one way is kind of cool, because then I don’t have to ever figure out how to tell them that I am or was on Adult FriendFinder. On the other hand, even though they contacted me through another site, I can’t help but assume that their primary goal is to have sex with me — which is not why *I’m* on the other sites primarily for. (Yeah, yeah, make the jokes that that’s what all guys are only after . I know that’s the joke. On the other hand, I’m sure some of you guys, at least, have been offended when that wasn’t true of you and someone assumed it was.)

More than a few times, I’d thought something regular was starting. lol. Regular as in regularly occurring. Then after 3 or 4 times getting together, I never hear from them again. (Except, weirdly, as friends on Facebook, but that’s a whole ‘nother phenomenon.)

As usual, I’m not sure I have a point here. I just feel like there’s some sort of ritual going on that I don’t have the instructions for and everyone else does.

Dammit.