Another Sex Blog

But, yeah, now I’m looking for a relationship of some sort. Let’s call it a friends-with-benefits-with-potential.

That’s something I have in my profile. Most of the guys I’ve actually met up with IRL seem to have understood what I meant by that — so that’s good.

What’s not good, is that I’m not sure what to do when it becomes clear that there’s no longer any potential. When it just becomes clear that an LTR just ain’t gonna happen. What then?

It’s not so much of a problem when it’s pretty clear after just one meeting. It’s more difficult to break things off when it goes beyond that.

There’s one guy I’ve met via Adult FriendFinder that really IS a FWB. I know we’re never going to have a romantic relationship or even anything long term. Some day he’s going to find a “real” girlfriend and, since he doesn’t believe in open relationship or being poly, our benefits part will go away. And I’m really ok with that. With him. He’s the exception.

Because I *am* looking for an LTR. But only if it’s right. I’m much happier being “single” than being in a relationship JUST to be in a relationship. (Look up “quirkyalone” for a much better description of that than I can explain.)

So, anyway, when it becomes clear to me that I just can’t see myself in a deeper relationship with someone I’ve met, I don’t see the point in continuing things. lol. I haven’t come across sex that’s *THAT* good yet, anyway. And while it’s NOT true in the real world that any woman can get laid any time she wants (a topic for another post sometime), it IS true here on Adult FriendFinder. So, it’s not like I’d keep seeing someone just because it might be my only chance for sex.

In one case when this happened — no, two cases — neither of us contacted the other again. This was after multiple meetings. It wasn’t even like we had a fight or disagreement. It just stopped.

Right now I have more than one… argh, what do I even call it?… friendships with benefits withOUT potential that I need to cut off. Even though they probably feel the same way, at least that’s been my experience so far, it makes for an uncomfortable feeling.

I feel like I might hurt their feelings. I’m afraid they’ll think that’s awfully egotistical of me to think that it would matter to them.

I’m sure it seems absurd to some here that I’m hoping for a so-called REAL relationship (though not traditional by any means).

I am, though. I can’t spend my friday and saturday nights with people who I *know* I won’t want to be hanging out with a year from now.

Just venting. Thanks for listening. As Always.

OMG OMG OMG.

Look. If you in ANY WAY KIND OF SORT OF relate to the guests on Jerry Springer, please do not contact me (unless I’m working on some sort of thesis for a PhD).

btw, my period of depression is on the upswing… not completely over, but by now I’m aware of the process…. right now I’m feeling hermit-ish, but not at the bottom of the pit. In case you were wondering.

I really like Jerry Springer. The man. Himself. I adore how reasonable he is with the guests on his show and, IMHO, seems not to judge them, for the most part.

But, I do NOT understand the guests. I don’t think I’m judging them when I say that I can’t relate to them, am I? Ok, I admit that I have flashes of thoughts that tell me I’m “better” than they are, but my conscious brain yells at me whenever that happens. I really really really think that there’s just something different in the way “those people” (sorry that that could be an offensive phrase; just not sure what else to say) and I, or people I think of as like me, think and view the world.

Have I mentioned before how much I’m obsessed with the Myers-Briggs personality Type test? MBTI? Well, I am. And I’m sure that has something to do what what I’m talking about here.

I just don’t get it. Them.

OTOH, in a weird way, it makes me not feel so bad about being such a weirdo myself. lol. I *know* others, a lot of others, think I’m a bit odd. That they don’t “get” me. The thing is that I still watch Jerry. I want to TRY to “get” them. I hope that maybe some of “them” want to “get” me, too. And that’s a teensy tiny bit of why I write what I do online. It’s a bigger part that I want people who are already like me to see that there’s others out there like them. (Geesh, that’s a run-on sentence… hopefully makes sense anyway.) But that other part is good, too.

Now I’m on a roll… turning into a longer post than I’d intended.

There are some issues that I don’t really want to try to understand the other side to. To take an extreme example… evangelicals. I can logically admit that they *might* be right. But, I already know that I’m not interested in trying to be convinced. It’s almost like a physical reaction. I think the analogy of allergies is overused, but appropriate here. I have no problem with evangelicals believing what they do, but leave me out of it. (Yeah, yeah, that kind of goes against the actual definition of evangelicalism. So sue me.)

I also feel the same way, for the most part, but not as strongly, about Republicans. I am a Democrat. I could probably be swayed by an Independent party. I. Hate. George. W. Bush. Period.

I watched one episode of the tv show Brothers and Sisters. (I’m not a real big tv watcher.) It was an episode where Calista Flockhart’s character thought she was pregnant. She spent part of the day *trying* to tell her b/f, Rob Lowe’s character, that she was pregnant, but didn’t get the chance cuz he was so busy running for office. When he finally came home for the day, he was all pissed off because the people working for him had figured out that was what she was trying to tell him and why didn’t she tell him first. He was being a complete ass. So, I said, you know what I learned from this episode? Never fuck a Republican!!! (It’s funnier, I think, if you’d seen the episode, but I didn’t want to type out all the idiosyncrasies of the characters and the episode here.)

I just can’t have a relationship with someone who isn’t as excited about Obama as I am. Once upon a time I liked Clinton. That changed. Even when I liked them both, I liked Obama *better*, though. And don’t get me started on McCain. However. I hope no one who reads this blog is taking offense at this. If you support McCain, or even hate Obama, I’m all for you doing what you think is best. Actively campaigning or just voting. Even having an intense discussion with me! I *like* talking to people that have different views than I do (as long as it doesn’t devolve into name calling and such.) But to have a relationship? And to me, even an ongoing fuck and run is still a relationship. Can’t do it. Can’t say that it makes logical sense. But, it’s just the way it is. **sigh** There are more than a few guys I’ve met in my lifetime that had this going against them. For some of them, this was, really, the *only* thing going against them. And I can’t get over it. It’s like instant anti-viagra. (except for me being a chick and all.)

Wow. Who knew Jerry could inspire this much blabbling?

I do respect and admire that guy. And I’m not ashamed to admit it.

Mostly.