Another Sex Blog

Guys will fuck anything that moves.

That’s what a lot of people believe. Or say they believe anyway.

I think about sex a lot. (I know, you’re saying “Noooo. Really?”) I don’t mean fantasizing, though I do that, too. I think about psychological and physical aspects of sex. I just find it fascinating and have the hardest time understanding that not everyone does, but that’s another thing I spend time thinking about…

So, the idea that men aren’t picky when it comes to who they’ll have sex with is one of those concepts, ideas, memes, that I sometimes ponder. I’m talking about basically a horny one-night stand, btw, not an ongoing relationship — even of the No Strings Attached variety.

So, guys, is it true?

It seems to me that people tend to hook up, either short term or long term, with people similar to themselves. In terms of looks. Good looking people with good looking people. Average with average. Etc. Yeah, there are the exceptions — the really hot model with the super rich not-so-hot older guy being the stereotypical example. But, you know, in general.

But when it’s “Hey, I wanna get laid tonight. Let’s see who I can take home…?”

Women (in general — this is all in general, I realize it could be different for any one individual) tend to only have sex with men they’re attracted to. Now that could be completely physical, but women also tend to find a guy that they really LIKE for whatever reason more attractive. As they get to know a guy, and begin to like him, their attraction actually grows. Sorry, I’m digressing.

Hmmm… it just occurred to me that there’s also the beer-goggles factor to consider.

Yes, this is *really* the kind of thing I spend LOTS of time wondering about.

Here’s a special link for all you guys who have a thing for women’s derrières, The Quest for the Perfect Bottom.

From the site:

The purpose of this diary is to document my search for the perfect female bottom. An Arthurian quest, though perhaps, perhaps, less noble - that being a merely matter of opinion. In my view is seems valid to consider a person, or part of a person in this case, to have as much an aesthetic quality as that of traditional forms of art such as those by Canova.

In that vein this diary does not contain pornography, or explicit pictures but will discuss famous bottoms that you can all enjoy. You know how to Google them.

I have a fascination with what and who guys find sexy. For some reason, I seem to attract guys who like booty. (Yes, I’m trying to use as many words for bum as possible.) Which is fine. I mean, I’m flattered that guys seem to like my backside, though why I can’t find a guy with a breast and nipple fetish is beyond me. I can’t figure it out. Anyway, enjoy, boys!

I just read this in someone’s profile: “a great relationship starts in the bedroom… then goes from there.”

That’s something I agree with and have meant to write about it. Compared to most people, I’m fairly kinky. I forget that since I’m so used to hanging out places like here (well, virtually hang out anyway), other similar online communities, and sometimes IRL with similarly minded people.

So… yes, I would like to have a romantic relationship. But, I don’t want just ANY one.

I’m a Quirkyalone.

Quirkyalone: noun/adj. A person who enjoys being single (but is not opposed to being in a relationship) and generally prefers to be alone rather than dating for the sake of being in a couple. With unique traits and an optimistic spirit; a sensibility that transcends relationship status.

So, I only want a relationship that is sexually non-monogomous. Enables/shares/celebrates (not sure of the right word) my kinks. Of course, there are other things I want, too, in a relationship, but those are very important to me.

So, sex first, then we can find out if we’re compatible other ways afterwards. I hear a lot the warning that women shouldn’t sleep with a guy right away. That guys don’t want to date a woman who slept with them so quickly. LOL! Great. I don’t WANT to date a guy who thinks like that, so my method weeds them out right away!

Actually, I went on a date with a guy recently. And I’m totally undecided if I want to go out with him again or not. I need to have sex with him before I can figure that out!

I have love and friendship. Absolutely wonderful friends and family. I have sex, even kinky sex. And if nothing else, this place has taught me that that will always be available! Although it would be Fabulous if I could have both in the same person. I’m not willing to give up the quality of either for that.

So, sweet talk me AND fuck me. Not necessarily in that order.

I’m watching Grey’s Anatomy. Which I’ve never watched before tonight. My Tivo recorded it for me. Probably because I regularly watch House, M.D.

So, I hope I’m not spoiling this for anyone, but if you have what I think is the most recent episode taped and haven’t watched don’t read this.

The main character, Meredith, is unconscious. Possibly dying. (She’s the GREY in Grey’s Anatomy, so wtf? Right?) Anyway, the guy I think is her boyfriend is sobbing and looks so upset. So does this other guy who’s her friend and who I think has a crush on her.

And now I’m mopey because I’m jealous. I want to have someone who would cry if I were unconscious in the ER. Someone who also wanted to have sex with me. And all vice versa. It’s almost as though I want a boyfriend.

Ugh. But, I don’t! For lots of good reasons that would be worthy of another post.

Seriously, I actually AM aware that it’s hormones that make me wistful and mushy lonely feeling like that. Not logic. It’ll pass.

Hmmm… now Tivo is showing me a documentary about a murder that took place in Palo Alto, CA. Stanford. I’ll have to keep an eye out for a librarian position open at Stanford. All those yummy geeks!

I think I need to go find a chick flick movie or chick lit book to “cuddle up” with for the night…

Here’s the fantasy he described.

In the Dark.

You come to my house and I welcome you at the door with a blindfold in hand. I promptly put it over your eyes so you become isolated from the environment immediately. Your Master guides you to a room and gets you undressed completely, leaving you stark naked and still blind. You are restrained next, arms behind your back, legs slightly opened and you are made to get on your knees. Next come hours and hours of complete loss of control. In the dark you will wait for whatever comes next never knowing what it is or when it is coming or how long you have been kneeling in that room. It may be your Master’s cock in your mouth, a gentle back rub, a hard spank, a juicy strawberry in your mouth, some aromatic oil, a vibrator in your pussy for what seems like hours. Your hair will be pulled, you will swallow you Master’s cum, you will feel his hands and his cock exploring every crevice, you will hear different sounds and music, wax will be poured on you, ice will be used on your nipples. Basically you won’t know what’s coming next, you won’t know when it will and all you can do is wait. You might have to wait 10 minutes or you might have to wait half an hour for the next thing. All you’ll know is that your Master has a long night of assaulting your senses in every possible way, sublime and painful, hard and soft, sweet and sour. You will not be allowed to fall asleep, your senses will be buzzing for your next sensation which could be simple or could be complex, and always it will be your Master’s decision until you can’t take it anymore and you beg to be released.

And then what happened…

He did blindfold me soon after I entered his house. Reality almost always interferes in enacting fantasies. I had to take off my jacket, hat, gloves! Blindfolded, he led me to another room and had me kneel on something soft to cushion my knees. He fastened a collar around my neck. He handcuffed my hands in front of me. I was still fully dressed. Fitted blazer, sheer blouse, black bra. Knee length pencil skirt, black thigh highs, black satin panties, and pink and black leopard print 4″ heels.

Honestly, I can’t tell you everything about the night in a linear fashion. I don’t remember. And it’s not because this took place last Saturday. I couldn’t have told you what happened in what order immediately afterwords either.

Not all of my senses were as heightened as others. I don’t think that I connect with music in the way many others do, for example. He played music that had heavy rhythms and sometimes drums. While I liked some of the songs and it did sometimes mask other noises, it wasn’t something I paid much attention to. Taste isn’t something that overwhelms me either. Of course, there are tastes that I love and crave, but I don’t feel the way that I’ve heard others who LOVE food describe.

My sense of touch, however, is very sensitive and during these hours, I felt like I could pinpoint each and every nerve. So that’s what I’ll describe most, what affected me most, what I remember, enjoyed, anticipated, and dreaded most. And, again, in not necessarily the order in which it happened.

He caressed my face. Ran his fingers through my hair. That feeling, of being petted like, well, a pet, is heavenly. Chills run through my body at the same time that a feeling of warmth does. At some point he removes my clothing. In steps. I’m left with only my panties.

He told me that he wanted to make me so wet that he’d be able to feel me seeping through the satin. So, I cheated a bit. I removed the cotton lining that’s in the crotch of most panties. Apparently, this made them somewhat sheer, too. And they felt fabulous. The silky smoothness lightly fondling my hairless lips. Mmmm.

He spanked me with his hand. Then gently smoothed the area he’d just hit. Cupping my ass. That was an electrifying feeling. Really. Like pricks of electricity in the area that had just been slapped. I felt him hold me gently and then… slap! As the night went on, those slaps got sharper. Once, twice?, my ass felt the sharp sting of a crop.

He’d purchased a Wartenberg Pinwheel. That was… wow. Lightly rolling over my skin, it almost tickled. Another sensation to give me the shivers. but then, when just a bit more pressure was applied and without being able to see and my sense of touch heightened… it felt exactly like I was being cut with a very sharp knife. Sliced. Since I was fully aware of what he was doing, what tool was being used, I *knew* that wasn’t what was happening. I trembled. Shook. It was horrible and I loved it.

Oh! I almost forgot about the candle wax. Much more than last time. On my breasts. It was the same as last time, though. Pain that miraculously disappears entirely. Extreme discomfort and then release. Akin to orgasm. Not like the spanking, btw, which lingers.

A feather very lightly on my skin. On my breastbone and my tummy. That took a little while for me to recognize. Did it come after the Pinwheel? It felt warm. I thought it was something liquid being poured on me at first. Then I realized what it was. And was grateful I’m not ticklish.

I know he meant for the spankings, the smacks and slaps on my ass, to be surprises. When he was holding me gently, kissing me, and petting me, I could tell when one was coming. His arm would pull back. There was a pause. And I’d tense to prepare for it. But, when he was just walking around… I’m sure I didn’t always know when he was near, but I think I did more than he realized. He smokes. Well, when he was actually smoking near me, he knew I could smell that, but I could detect the odor of cigarettes even when he wasn’t smoking at the time. If he was near enough. And I would brace myself. Eventually, I was in an almost constant state of tension. Waiting for another strike of pain. And those spankings HURT! Fuck! MUCH later, I could still feel a thin line of pain where the crop had made contact. The tension, clenching my muscles, when I though he might be near and trying to sneak up on me… I came close to crying. Not from any actual sensation, but from the anxiety.

My thighs ached. I thought “I’m going to HAVE to tell him that I can’t stay in this position any longer. I need to move.” But, I didn’t. He had me stand at one point, for just a short time, and I was unable to do so on my own. I held onto him, gripped his shoulders. Actually, of everything, this, I think, shows the best how much I trusted him. I’ve never been able to play that game where you fall backwards and trust that your parter, behind you, will catch you. I just can’t do it. Even if it’s someone I KNOW would never ever hurt me and would do anything to protect me from harm… I’m certain they’ll be distracted at just the wrong moment. But, I trusted him to hold me standing and not let me fall.

He put clamps on my nipples, when I still had my bra on so there was some protective padding. (Do you know how difficult it is to find bras these days that *aren’t* molded? It’s crazy.) Other times, he pulled on my nipples. Squeezed my breasts. Teased me.

I don’t know that any of this really sounds erotic. But, it was. I DID get very wet.

Photos were taken throughout all of this. Flashes went off. It was disconcerting. Not having any idea of what I looked like and having my picture taken. While I knew pictures were being taken, there were times when I must have not really been paying attention to that, because I later saw photos that I could tell were taken at times that I wasn’t at all concsious of them.

He fed me his cock. For those new to my blog (waving at newcomers, if there are any), that is one of my biggest turn-ons. OMG. I love having my mouth full with cock. My tongue being kept busy. And, I have a serious cum fetish. So as I sucked him, as he fucked my face, I knew that I was going to get to taste and swallow his cum. That just made me wetter.

I collapsed on the floor. Layed down, very comfortable. He left me for a while. The song “You Sexy Thing” came on. LOL. I love that song. I started dancing, while lying down. I think he missed seeing that, but I’m not sure. I know I had a huge smile on my face. I swear it’s a good thing that song didn’t play earlier when something more intense was going on. I would have started bobbing and grinning and that would have been weird! Hehe.

He made me cum with his fingers thrusting inside of me. He gets right at my G spot, the underside of my clit, whatever it is in that spot that is just amazing. I don’t know when that happened exactly. Near the end or after he’d taken off the blindfold and collar and handcuffs?

We took a bubble bath and I got to be giggly and girly and goofy. Very relaxed. He told me that he was happy with what had happened. He was pleased. And that made me *glow* inside.

Not everything was as perfect as he wanted it to be, I’m sure. Some of the sensations he tried to provoke in me really weren’t happening. I mean, they happened, but weren’t out of the ordinary. Didn’t overwhelm me. Obviously, others very much did. Probably more than he knows either way. Those that were less and those that were more.

Lots more happened than what I wrote about here. These are the parts that will stay with me, though.

Thanks for letting me share.

I don’t know exactly what it is, but *something* is going on.

I’m all of a sudden getting a gazillion bazillion emails and winks and invites on AFF.

I thought it might have something to do with the recent pictures I’ve put up here on my blog, but I don’t see an increase in the number of people viewing my blog, so… I just don’t know.

Of course, none of the emails are from anyone who seems to have actually read what I’m looking for.

I’m NOT looking for NSA sex. Or a “discreet” relationship. If you’re looking for a monogamous relationship, look elsewhere. I have no interest in submissive men or couples. (Disclaimer: Ok, I *have* responded to couples before. But, they wrote a damn good email and were better-than-average-good-looking!)

I’m not complaining, btw, I just don’t get it. It’s a definite sudden increase in volume. It seems like there must be an explanation.

Oh well, I guess I’ll just enjoy the attention. I do like the attention.

And sitting here in my bed with my laptop is a nice way to spend my evening. Especially since the muscles in my thighs and in my butt are really aching. Oh? Did I forget to mention I had another “date” this weekend? That involved bondage and me being on my knees for… what was it? Three and a half hours, I think?

Guess I’ll have to tell about that another time.

Like that wasn’t already obvious from the way I like to WRITE about my experiences.

Having my photos on AFF, *especially* the one in my photo albums, is such a huge turn-on. I mean, the thought of having erotic photos of me looked at was always a major fantasy of mine, but sometimes the fantasy is really all there is. The reality either doesn’t match up in excitement, or is even unpleasant in real life.

My biggest turn-ons are mental. Not tangible. I get turned on thinking about telling people about what turns me on. I masturbate thinking about a guy *telling* me what he’s going to do… as opposed to thinking about having things done to me or doing things myself.

When I first posted my profile on AFF — the one I have now, but also, actually, the one I had right before the current one — I got some emails from guys telling me that reading it got them hard. A few told me they jerked off while reading it.

Wow. MY fantasies were charged for weeks with those thoughts! Thoughts of thoughts. And now thinking that there are people seeing, and hopefully becoming aroused by, my recent “x-rated” pictures… every time I think of it I get hot and bothered. (Very inconvenient since my hips have a tendency to start rocking involuntarily when I’m getting horny!)

I’m reeeeeealy tempted to post more of those in my profile so that more people can see them. (Ok, well more paying members anyway. I know you can’t see them full-sized if you’re not a paying member. Too bad, cheapskates. If I can pay, so can you! )

So, my questions. Two. First, is that just a really bad idea? To post them? Is it just asking for trouble? Second, for those of you who both read my blog AND are in my network and have seen the pics I’m talking about, which one/s should I post for all to see if I do decide to do so?

LOL. Thinking about what some people *might* think about IF they see them… I’m already turned on by that!

I’m so odd. But, you know, in a good way. At least I keep *myself* entertained!

One year ago tomorrow, I quit smoking. That’s a much bigger event than most people realize because as a fairly direct result of quitting I ended up on Adult FriendFinder.

I still miss smoking something awful. For those of you who have never smoked, really, you have no idea what it’s like. I’m not saying it’s the worst thing in the world. I’m not saying “you can’t imagine what it’s like” as a challenge of any sort. I just don’t think it’s really understandable to someone else. And I ALSO don’t think it’s necessarily understandable even if you *are* a smoker. Even if you’re an EX-smoker. Someone who’s already quit, too. Because the stories I’ve heard from other quitters are often unlike what I experienced as well as unlike other stories. It seems to me that it’s a very individual and unique experience for each person. Hell, even for each TRY for each person.

For me, quitting smoking is still very similar to having someone close to me die. (And, yes, I *have* experienced that, which is why I feel comfortable making the comparison.) I still *forget* that I don’t smoke. I’ll be going to my car and think “oh, hey, I’ll have a smoke when I get in… oh, wait. I don’t do that anymore.” And then miss it all over again. I’m not miserable like I was the first few days, but I’m not “over it” either — as some people seem to think I should be after a year.

Back to my *celebration*, though. I took bupropion (aka Wellbutrin or Zyban) to help with the quitting. A side effect of bupropion, for many people, is WOW extreme increase in libido!!!

Though I’d had a generic account on AFF for years, I finally filled out the profile for real and started *using* the site.

I’m so happy that I did that. It hasn’t been all sunshine and roses. I’ve gotten nasty emails that I reacted way too sensitively to. I’ve had my feelings hurt. I’ve been insulted and used.

Overall, being an active member of Adult FriendFinder is one of the best things I’ve ever done. (Yeah, better than quitting smoking, smartasses! )

Mostly I’ve had extraordinary compliments thrown my way. And verbal (or written) approval (for lack of a better word) is VERY important and satisfying to me. I’ve “met” other women who share my kinks as well as those who don’t, but respect my preferences.

I’ve had some really GREAT sex. I’ve been able to do things that I always wanted to at least try.

As cheesy as it sounds, and I know it does sound horribly cheesy, I feel empowered.

So, uhm, thanks everyone.

I just realized that this whole thing might sound like a goodbye message. It’s NOT! I’m STILL having a grand ‘ole time! I just thought there should be some sort of acknowledgment around this time. I can’t believe it’s ONLY been a year.

Here’s to many more to come.

(Hey! I made a pun!)